Yeah, it seems as though when you’re a mom (especially of younger children) that the last thing in the world that you have is any time to yourself.
You’ve got the kids pulling on you, crying, needing this or that and then if you’re married, there’s your husband who is ALSO demanding time from you.
AHHH! When can I find time for ME?! What about MEEE??
Yep, I totally feel you.
I have 4 children and right now, I’m MUCH more freed up with my time because they’re older. My eldest 2 children are 22 and 21 and my two youngest are 15 and 11. So they’re not as needy in terms of my time as they were when they were younger.
But back when they were, it was challenging to find that time. Sometimes I had to steal away. My youngest daughter was the most difficult. I nursed her (as I did all of my children) and she was VERY demanding.
When she was like 2-5 years old, if I wanted to go shopping with a friend or just go anywhere without the kids (as infrequently as that was) I would have to literally have my older kids call her into one of their rooms as though they wanted to play with her, close the door and then I’d sneak out.
Oftentimes I could hear her little footsteps running into the living room and her screaming and crying for me as I went to get into the car.
But I felt I had to do that from time to time:
(1.) because I needed to have a little bit of time away. I never asked for much of that… I realized I’m a mom… a parent and they didn’t ask to be born. But if only once a week if that, I had to have some mom time. No shame in my game as far as that is concerned. And…
(2.) she needed to stop being SO attached to me that I couldn’t go 20 feet from her without her having a fit. It was weaning from the breast time and… yeah, we needed to get past that separation anxiety.
How Can You Go About Finding Time For Yourself As A Stay At Home Mom?
Now it is important to have a good support base if you can. Your or your husband’s parent(s) or other relative (teenage niece or cousin who needs/wants money would be great) or a close friend or your spouse/partner who will agree to grant you a scheduled, “mommy time” outing every once in a while.
And if you’re like I was where when we moved from Michigan to Washington state (3000 or so miles away from ALL of our friends and family) and DON’T have a support base you can rely on to help you out, then you may need to try an outside source such as hiring a sitter from a reputable place such as Care.com where they pre-screen their service providers. A really good friend of mine is a Nanny and got hired and the family LOVES her to death! Or, if you can, try to get it in during nap time.
Once you’ve gotten that, here are some ways for you to try and find time for yourself as a stay at home mom:
- Bath time (make it special… candles, soothing music, scented bubble bath and a LOCKED DOOR)
- Shopping trip
- Take a walk
- See a movie
- Make a pampering appointment (hair, mani-pedi, massage)
- Have a once a month girls night out
- Have a date night once or twice a month
- Girls night out
- Date night
- Go out to eat
I’m sure there are many more things you can do. If YOU have some suggestions as to what a mom can do for a little “me time”… I’d love to hear them in the comments.
Come on, share YOUR favorite thing to do when you need a break!'Til next time... bye for now!
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